Change of plans. I need to drop every thing I’m doing and Focus on the Family.
This fall, the Friday James Dobson announced his retirement from his radio show, I went out and celebrated – literally – as in I had a few drinks and bonded with a formerly Christian friend. I walked home in the sleet - warmed inside by the thought of another childhood icon biting the dust. Yesterday Focus on the Family paid CBS 2.8 million dollars to allow a sweet mother and adorable son push their pro-life, anti-choice agenda world-wide.
The Christian Conservative movement does not die with Falwell or Dobson. It just gets a 2.8 million dollar makeover.
It won’t be a surprise to regular readers – but – DUH – Christine is Pro-Choice - as in blessed are the women who Choose to procreate when, why, and where they Choose to procreate and No Shame for the women who Choose not to procreate. Keep it Safe, Legal, and Rare - not Dangerous, Illegal, and More-Common-Than-You're-Willing-To-Admit. To others Christine is pro-killing-babies-in-a-slippery-slope-towards-a-heathen-communist-country-like-china-or-one-of-those-socialist-tundras-in-europe-that-kills-adults-when-they-become-a-burden-on-society-and-God-will-punish-us-mightily-for-our-inability-to-honor-the-sacredness-of-innocent-life-and WE WILL PAY!!!!
Knowing that certain family members are actively active in Minnesota’s Pro Life movement and having been righteously anti-choice once upon a time myself… needless to say – this is a touchy subject. The fact that 20 some years of my life were directly and indirectly influenced by James Dobson and Focus on the Family – I don’t know where to start.
2.8 million dollars they could have thrown at single mothers in poverty.
2.8 million dollars they could have used to lobby to end the wars that kill or internally, externally maim sons and brothers and fathers like Tebow – instead of the simulation of war in the stadiums. (I’d rather have simulation than real war – but isn’t he lucky he could afford to CHOOSE which war he wanted to play in?)
2.8 million dollars they could have thrown at any number of women and children – just for the hell of it.
2.8 million dollars they could have given to young men and women who want to explore the world before they try to teach their kids about the world.
2.8 million dollars they could have used to pay for a mother’s or child’s medical bills.
2.8 million dollars they could have used to pay Grannie's heating bills.
2.8 million dollars that is estimated to bring in 10 million dollars of awareness – or should I say – 10 million dollars Focused on the Family BRAND NAME.
How can I fight that? Why should I even try? Sometimes I really dislike my own rants. More often than not I stop myself from publishing whiny woe-is-me bullshit. But not today.
Focus on the Family played daily in my childhood home – in the car (actually the family van was more a bus) – in the mail – from the pulpit – from the kitchen (where I spent most of my family time) - in my brain. Not everything James Dobson said was unreasonable or even unwise. I learned how to be a model child and teenager right alongside my parents learning how to be model parents – the problem being – I was never a problem child – and never could have been if I tried since I didn’t know how to misbehave.
This is me saying – Fuck You! - to Focus on the Family. ..|,
That may sound a bit immature – and will probably lose the respect of reasonable readers. All that angst. All that emotion. Obviously she needs to return to the Love of Christ.
I’ve written about the Truth Project before. But I can’t stop little children I love from being brainwashed by FOTF's Adventures in Odyssey. Will they ever have the guts to say – no thanks - much less fuck you – to the male-dominated Focus on the Family?
I suggest for their next ad they have a father hugging a little girl saying,“Because of 2.8 million dollars thrown at Anti-Choice advertising , my wife felt obligated to have another child – even though she felt she had popped out her fair share. She tried to put her foot down, but I coerced that silly little lady into sex and we conceived this beautiful Miracle of God. She would have made it to the photo shoot, but she’s knee deep in laundry. I plan to bring up this girl knowing she can be anything she wants to be with her husband's approval, but she’ll always remember, if things don’t pan out for her, she can always pop out a few charmers of her own. Just ask her mom. Who is at home fulfilling her wifely duties. Thanks James Dobson and Focus on the Phallic!… I mean Family!”
Now I like me a good Phallic now and then, but right now I’m using the next best thing – my two middle fingers to salute the 2.8 million dollars Focus on the Family donated to single, poor mothers everywhere, the maimed and dead soldiers coming back from the Middle East, the education of young men and women, widows, grandmothers who can’t afford their heating bills, the pre-natal health-care of thousands of women, day-care, and the shoveling of sidewalks.
And God forbid an unwanted baby is born and adopted by a loving homosexual couple. Lord Have Mercy.
I know, I know....the ad is SOOO Innocent. I shouldn’t get my panties in a bunch.
I’m here to guarantee 100% that ukuleles and feathery-voiced lalala jingles do NOT make this ad innocent – and that I’m not wearing panties.
Have a nice day.